Memes (article published in jmag, April 2009)

Below is an small piece I wrote for jmag (music magazine). Look out for it in the April 2009 issue:

1. I’m On A Boat
The Lonely Island — three dudes behind the dorkomedy ‘Hot Rod’ and now on the writing staff for SNL — recently released an entire album of ‘Incredibad’ tracks just like this one (you may have seen/heard their debut single Jizz In My Pants). Watch it, motherfucker. This shit is real.

Fave lyric/rhyme: I’m on a boat and, it’s going fast and, I got a nautical theme pashmina afghan.

2. Stuff On My Cat
Another cat meme. It’s so shit. I love it. It’s like lolcats, with half the effort. Step one: find a cat. Step two: place stuff on your cat. Step three: take a photo of your cat and post it at stuffonmycat.com alongside other golden moments like the Diana Ross cat, a cat spooning a pug, and quite a lot of inanimate objects — trash seems to be a reoccurring theme — on top of cats.

3. Goat Bandit
In case you missed it… here’s what made the “World News” in The Australian newspaper last Australian Day. Apparently a couple of armed hoodlums were caught attempting to jack a Mazda 323. One got away and the other turned himself into a goat. Way to bleat [sic] the system eh? Must have got the idea from those wily camels dressed like the Blues Brothers tearing-it-up in a Rav4?

4. Forrest Gump In 1 Minute
Save yourself 141 minutes and inhale the entire Forrest Gump film epic in a single minute (and the length of one football field). Imagine if those clever college kids started [re]making other one-take, one-minute movies. Well they have. I went ahead and watched Kill Bill (Parts 1 & 2) in one minute). Have a dig and you’ll find loads of 60-second bootleg blockbusters including Fight Club, Wall-E, Alien, Jurassic Park and loads more in Jack Black’s “sweded” format.

5. Take On Me (The Literal Version)
Take on some new lyrics in the form of blatantly obvious commentary of the video clip, set to the song’s original score: audible laughter. Dustin McLean, of dustfilms.com (also the Senior Animator behind Current TV’s hilarious SuperNews) seems to have a penchant for pointing out the absurdity of 80s clips — also top value, the literal version of Billy Idol’s White Wedding (searchable on any good streaming video site). Though it seems this very funny, very cynical dude could make Bob Dylan seem like a naff c#@t.

NB: You can see all the videos above online at youtube.com/triplejmag

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Seven things you didn’t know about me.

To show my appreciation at Julian Cole‘s efforts to jump-start my blog, here are a few things you may not have known about me.

1. I have always wanted to be a doctor.
Ever since I was knee-high to a grasshopper I have wanted to be a Doctor — a Pediatrician to be exact. At the age of 8 my cousin Karl and I planned opening a surgery together. My sister Shelley asked if she could join in. We told her she could be the receptionist. Two years my junior, she is now a Lawyer with a dual degree. What a chauvinist I was in my pre-teen ignorance.

New York State Map

2. I bicycled from NYC to Montreal.
With everything we needed strapped to our bikes, walkie talkies and a couple of maps, my girlfriend and I set off to peddle from New York to Montreal. We cycled through upstate New York, Albany, through the Adirondack Mountains, Utica, Syracuse, Woodstock, Rochester, Buffalo, Niagara, Toronto and Montreal.  (about 100km/day and roughly 1400kms in total).

3. I witnessed the twin towers fall.
For an hour or so that morning in 2001, it seemed like the residents of New York City weren’t sure what had actually happened. It wasn’t until the second plane hit and reports of others hijacked flights across the country that the hysteria really set in. Trying to make it back to an apartment in Astoria (Queens) with my girlfriend, swirls of smoke rose up the towers: in fact the first tower had just sunk into the ground. In what felt like a scene our of Independence Day (film) cars on the express way began smoking to a holt and banking-up in front of us. To avoid being gridlocked we reversed up an on-ramp — in hindsight dangerous manouvre — and muddled our way home through backstreets. We sat on the couch, scared numb, watching updates on the television until the second tower fell and all but a few of the television networks blacked-out. Thoughts running through my head at the time: Is this WW3? Should we get in the car and drive up-state?

Two items were sold out across the country for the month following — gas masks and American flags. It says quite clearly what people’s priorities were at that time, doesn’t it.

Andy Miller as Pyjama Boy

4. Winning a radio competition kick-started my career in music.
Talking to Jay and the Doctor on triple j’s Breakfast program about my adventure around the world in pyjamas, I was fortunate enough to win a return trip for two people to see the Foo Fighters play in Cardiff (with support from The Subways, Razorlight and Oasis). I didn’t wear my pyjamas for the whole time. But I thought it appropriate to fulfill my on-air promise at the gig.

5. I recently started playing the piano again.
I started playing the piano when I was 6 years old and reached Grade 7 practical piano. Since moving out of home a few years ago, I haven’t had a piano to practice. Recently Sean Rubenstein-Dunlop (a friend of mine and reporter for the ABC — recently featured on the PM program presenting a story on a new social network for sick kids) moved in and brought with him a lovely electric piano. I loosened up my fingers by learning Yann Tiersen’s “Comptine D’un Autre Ete: L’apres Midi” (Theme from Amelie) and plan to learn a couple of more of my favourites including Chopin’s Nocturne in E Flat Major and Fantasie Impromtu.

Custom built vintage track bike

6. Fixed gear bikes.
I love nothing more than riding my bike through the city, out to the beach or even just 100 metres from home to buy an icecream. I think I would be completely happy if all I had was my bike, white sand on a beach and a handful of friends to share it with.

7. I recently learned that you can fracture a doodle.
Read all about it. And watch the Grey’s Anatomy ‘for TV version’ here.

I’ve tagged the following people:

Nick Crocker
Scott Drummond
Ravi Vasavan
Dave Ruby Howe
Stefanie Smith
Mariam Arcilla
Megan Cullen

Here are the rules…
Share seven facts about yourself in the post.
Link to your original tagger and list these rules in your post.
Tag seven people at the end of your post by leaving their names and the links to their blogs.
Let them know they’ve been tagged.

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Bloc Party @ Hordern Pavillion

I’m really not a fan of the Hordern Pavillion as a venue. But for a huge act like Bloc Party you really can’t argue with that venue choice. The guys were extremely gracious during a meet & greet with triple j winners. Kele welcomed the 10 winners and their guests from on stage, as they made their way across the vast hanger-like space. The band finished the soundcheck with three tunes especially for the 20 punters voluntarily jammed up against the pit barrier. After soundcheck Kele, Russell, Gordon and Matt took the time to meet everyone personally and sign whatever was thrown in front of them.

Their set was a perfect mix of their huge radio hits and new material.

Check out the rest of the photos from their Sydney show @ The Hordern Pavillion on the triple j gallery.

Big ups to a band who are grounded enough to know the value of their fans and really know how to turn-on a live performance.

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